Being Human: Beyond Therapy Talk
I’m no expert—far from it. I’m just someone who observes the little patterns in life, tries to untangle them, and occasionally wonders if they even make sense. One thing I’ve been noticing lately is how therapy talk has seeped into our everyday conversations. Words like “boundaries,” “triggers,” and “emotional labour” have become part of our casual lexicon. At first, I thought this was a significant step forward. Therapy talk feels like progress—proof that we’re breaking the stigma around mental health. But sometimes, it doesn’t feel like progress at all.
More often than not, I see people using therapy language as a way to shift blame, avoid accountability, or shut down others. “You’re responsible for your own triggers,” they might say—until it’s their triggers in question, at which point the world must immediately accommodate them. Therapy talk, meant to foster understanding and healing, can sometimes morph into a sharp-edged tool for deflection and judgment.
And that’s not the only shift I’ve noticed. In our eagerness to embrace vulnerability, we’ve also developed a strange habit of downplaying other people’s pain. You share something personal, a real struggle, only for someone to dismiss it with, “Oh, that’s nothing. You’re upset about that?” It’s as if they’ve decided what qualifies as “real” pain and what doesn’t. But here’s the thing: pain isn’t up for debate. If someone is hurting, they’re hurting. Full stop. Instead of minimizing their experience, maybe we could just sit with it, listen, and say, “I hear you. I’m here for you.”
The Many Ways to Live One Life
This brings me to a bigger question I’ve been thinking about lately: why do we act like there’s only one “right” way to live? There are over 7 billion people worldwide, meaning there are at least 7 billion ways to find meaning in life. And yet, some people seem convinced they’ve discovered the singular answer to happiness and purpose, and everyone else is simply doing it wrong.
Someone once told me, “It’s meaningless to chase after money and power. I just feel sad for people who do.” And while I get where they were coming from, that statement didn’t sit right with me. Sure, it’s easy to dismiss the pursuit of wealth and influence if you’ve never had to worry about putting food on the table. But what about the parent working three jobs to feed their kids? Or the entrepreneur building something from nothing to give their family a better future? For them, money and power aren’t meaningless—they’re essential.
It’s not just about survival, either. Some people genuinely enjoy the grind. Not everyone finds meaning in work, but plenty of people do. To the person who grew up with nothing, working tirelessly to ensure their children have more opportunities than they did might be the most meaningful thing in the world. Who are we to say that’s wrong or empty?
The truth is, there’s no one-size-fits-all formula for a meaningful life. What resonates with one person might not resonate with another, and that’s okay. Life is messy, multifaceted, and deeply personal. The sooner we embrace that, the sooner we can let go of judgment and focus on connection.
Finding Meaning in the Passage of Time
English comedian Jim Carr (not my favourite, but credit where it’s due) once said the purpose of life is “to enjoy the passage of time.” And honestly, I love that. Life isn’t about checking off someone else’s boxes or living up to anyone else’s standards. It’s about figuring out your own path and embracing the imperfect journey.
For me, that means stepping away from judgment—not just of others but of myself. I don’t want to waste my days deciding whose pain is valid or whose life choices make sense. I want to focus on my own path, what makes my time meaningful, and let others do the same. After all, we’re all on unique journeys, shaped by different experiences, challenges, and dreams. Why not let people be?
Of course, this isn’t to say that coexistence is always easy. We clash. We bump into each other’s values. But wouldn’t it be better to approach those moments with grace? To acknowledge that every path is different and every life carries its own meaning? Maybe then we could stop dismissing and start understanding.
A Thought from Nietzsche
As Friedrich Nietzsche once said:
“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.”
For me, the “why” is connection—the kind that comes from empathy, not judgment. It’s about recognizing that no one has life all figured out, and that’s what makes it beautiful. Life isn’t about finding the “right” way to live—it’s about finding your way and letting others find theirs.
So here’s to the journey. To the messy, beautiful, complicated passage of time. May we all find meaning—whatever that looks like—and cheer each other on along the way.